Kailey's Story

Hi there, friends! I’m Kailey and I blog over at Cheers to Plan A. It is a sweet little space where I shared our journey through the adoption process. I also love sharing how the Lord is stirring me to become more like Him and drawing me closer and closer always. I am super passionate about authentic relationships and walking with people through their journeys of adoption, infertility, and/or miscarriages. Please connect with me on Instagram, I love making new friends {@kbirkeland}. 

I am so honored to share our story with you today. I hope when you are finished reading that you see the Lord in every detail in your life and know that He loves you so deeply it's almost unfathomable. Enjoy! 

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Sweet friends, I am beyond honored to share a beautifully written story that only our amazing God could orchestrate. My husband and I never thought that we would face the decisions and procedures we have over the last six years, but God did. He knew from the very beginning of time that this would be our story, this would be how He received the glory He deserves.

Both of us wanted to be parents, but definitely disagreed on the timing of it all. We agreed while we were engaged we would wait five years to start our family. Little did I know, the desire to become a mommy almost immediately became all-consuming for me. I was on birth control briefly but stopped about three months after we were married. We quickly decided it was not the best route for us. Long story short… that stuff made me crazyNow as I look back, I am certain that fear drove that decision. I was fearful the longer I took birth control, the longer it would take us to conceive. At this point, I did not know how this one thing not happening in my life would be the catalyst to bring me closer to Jesus than ever before and bring a ministry I’ve longed for for years. 

And so the journey to growing our family began. I was convinced every single month that I was pregnant. I wasn’t. There was always hope. Every. Single. Time. But I never saw those two little lines most women have the unbelievable honor to see.

At the beginning of 2011, we decided it was time to see my OB. For the next two years, we journeyed through testing and more testing, surgery, procedures, crying, screaming, throwing of things, and wondering why in the world there wasn’t a baby in my belly. Each disappointment was an opportunity for the Lord to use my pain for purpose and I knew He was calling me. He had something so amazing for me. He had the best for me. But we were just so desperate, so my husband and I took matters into our own hands. The whole time, He was whispering, “Come to Me, Kailey, I have what you need. Do you trust me?” 

But, it was time for us to have a baby and I wanted to make it happen. We went to a specialist and began our first IUI cycle with clomid. We did two more rounds with no success. By the end of April 2013, I didn’t even recognize myself in the mirror. I was overweight and more depressed than ever. The Lord met me there and used a very special someone to speak to me. He knew the person that could confront me could only be, my mom.  

The conversation I had with my mom was probably the most pivotal moment in our journey. It got my attention. I was so blinded and had such a one-track mind. Get a baby in my belly. That’s all I could focus on. That’s it. I was not going to church. I did not want to be around anyone, I did not care about anything except getting pregnant. My mother has always had the tough conversations with me, but this one beats them all. She said she had been praying and did not want to have this conversation, but she knew she had to. She let me know that this was not living. She knew I was going to be upset. And I was. She had the tough conversation, knowing that I would not like it. But, I knew she was right. She was beyond right. That conversation removed the blinders from my eyes. I could finally see. I could hear Jesus saying again, “Come to Me, Kailey, I have what you need. Do you trust me?” 

All of those meds, appointments, and taking things into my own hands... did not create a little life in my belly. I spent all that time trying to get what I wanted, but I ended up getting the furthest thing that I thought I wanted. I got Plan A.

The next week I started a weight loss program and began spending some major time with Jesus. Again, He was saying, “Come to Me, Kailey, I have what you need. Do you trust me?” Finally, I realized that God had another plan. The best plan and it was not the one I had written. He was calling me to chase Him… live the story He had written for me even before I was born. And adoption was going to be a part of the story.

Adoption had been on my heart since 2005, but not on my husband’s. The night he asked me to marry him, I remember telling him I needed him to be okay with adoption before I said yes. He said “if we cannot have our own kids, then we could adopt.” Fast-forward six years later, our house was still super quiet and we did not know why. We were never told we could not conceive children, so there we were, at a crossroad: do we wait until a doctor tells us we cannot conceive? Or do we believe the Lord has another story for us? We wanted to be told our Plan A wasn’t going to happen, so we could go to God’s Plan A. But God. Don’t you just love those words? He knew that we needed to grow our faith in Him and learn to lean only on Him to live our story, the story He had written for us.  

Over the next three months we prayed separately about how our family was going to grow. Throughout this time of prayer, I did not mention anything about adoption to my husband. I was not going to be the one to change his mind or his heart; Jesus was. So there I was again, hearing the Lord say once again, “Come to Me, Kailey, I have what you need. Do you trust me?”  I did trust Him, with all my heart and so did my husband. We knew that the Lord had spoken clearly to us both. In August 2013, my husband looked over to me and said, “So about adoption. I’m ready.” Cue, crying and laughing and crying some more. I was thrilled about this new adventure. This was the adventure the Lord had lead us to and there was no doubt that He was right there with us.

After one year of waiting in the adoption process, we were matched with our birthmother in December 2014. While we were waiting and getting to know our birthmother, she told us that she chose us because we did not have any biological children. This time, Jesus did not say, “Trust Me,” He said, “My love, now you understand.”

Our baby, Evangelyn Rose, was born May 6th, 2015, at 4:46 a.m. We were able to be in the birthing room when she was born and I was able to cut the umbilical cord. She is now eight weeks old and we are having the time of our lives. We are thrilled that she was Plan A!